I decided that I (and Gary) would actually try the Jewish youth group for grown-ups… but not coincidentally I chose the event at an indoor rock climbing gym. I thought it might attract interesting people, and conveniently work together with Fight Training... Even more closely than I thought.
Some of the people climbing there had the most intricate back and shoulder muscles. It was quite impressive to witness some of the exercises for grip strength and working with your own body weight. I admire how they must have trained to get to this point.
Aside from noticing how sexy women climbers can be, and having a nice, caring partner activity for me and Gary (smooches give extra climbing power)...
For me, the time spent climbing today was about pushing past some intense feelings of fear and doubt. Facing crucial moments where I felt paralyzed and insecure, gripping onto the wall 30 feet up, I had to, literally and metaphorically, let go and trust in myself to just go for it. I think I started out more scared than I was at 15 years old, but was able to overcome this fear much better than that Elissa had. On the first wall, where we were getting cleared for safety skills, I hardly made it two steps up, before I panically called out, "okay, i'm scared." and just froze there until Gary lowered me down. The harness was tight, and the ropes secure. I trust Gary, but fear, unfortunately, is not rational. The next wall I faced was slanted so far forward -- aka the easy way. I made it to the top, but my heart was beating so fast, and when I came down, Gary said my lips were blue. I remembered to use my legs, but may have forgotten to breathe. On the fifth and final climb, I scaled straight up a difficult wall. Focused on the physical task in front of me, at one point, I raised my foot up to waist level to reach a small hold, and pushed my body up, not even knowing where my hands might grab. At that moment, I was able to get out of my own way. I was not held back by fear of failure. Just like the Karate Kid, I knew I had to fight, because I was scared.
Pushing and pulling, grip strength, preparing mentally for each short burst of battling up the wall, strength and agility -- all good, practical Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu skills practiced, but I uncovered even more.
Overall, I feel motivated to be extraordinary. There were two fairly standard photographs hanging on the wall that actually provided a moment of clarity for me. One was a woman scaling straight up an enormous wall outside, and the other, a woman practicing yoga at sunset in a field. This scene was even called 'Prana', and that’s how I felt. At that moment I knew it was right to trust the times that I feel the sustaining life force inside of me; that overwhelming sense of inner calm and openness. The wild woman in me can overtake the girl part who gets satisfaction from external possessions and mainstream societal impositions.
In the woman climbing, I saw an incredible sense of confidence and determination in her face, and that was when I set my eyes on the prize.
-Elissa Hope
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